Davis has been teething this last week- usually it hasn't been a big ordeal- but since he is cutting his 2nd top tooth and a 3rd bottom tooth at the same time- it's been pretty rough. During this time, he's been waking up screaming bloody murder once or twice a night, so I go in, try to calm him down, rub his back, turn him on his side, give him his pacifier and walk out. But now, instead of just lying there until he falls back to sleep, he sits up, looks at me and reaches his arms up high to me and just bawls. Heart breaking and heart melting.
So of course I pick him up. And for the first time in his short little life, he has started to snuggle with me. He tucks his little head in my neck or leans his face against mine...and I've realized he just wants me to hold him and rock him. This is amazing and new because he's never wanted to do anything before but his own thing. He has been a very independent little man since day one- always trying to look awake, alert and on the move. So as you can imagine- this is such a treat for me. I feel like I'm becoming a mom all over again.
It's so sweet. We sit in the rocker- he faces one way and lays his head against my chest and I bundle his legs up and hold him. We rock for about ten minutes, then he tries to turn the other direction, I hold him exactly the same way, rock for about ten minutes, and then he lets me know he's ready to go back to bed...so I put him in his crib, and walk out.
And I float back to my bedroom and secretly hope he'll wake up again in a couple hours. It's become like clockwork the past three nights...and I'm torn because I love it, it's the best, but I also don't want to make a bad habit that becomes a big issue to break. But my friend Jess, at work, told me today that he probably just needs a little extra care while he's hurting...and I think she is right.
Anyway- as much as I've tried to make sure Davis feels confident and comfortable around all of our friends and family- I'm loving this sweet time between the two and I. I really love this bad habit.
so sweet!
ReplyDeleteoh this is beautifully bittersweet, isn't it? the start of a long line of years where one way or another you will be there to love and hold him when he's hurting and he will know he can count on you. i am so glad you have this blog, i love reading these things and learning through you guys. so sweet.
ReplyDeletexoxo
n