Excuuuuse Me?

Total showdown at the Bennett house last night. Bennett was out of town, Honey was in town, and she and little D stayed up till 9:00 while I went to the YMCA. He was as kind and happy as a clam...and then it was time to go to bed. He has been giving us such a hard time for about the last month about going to bed, staying in bed, and not waking me up at the butt crack of dawn. However, Monday and Tuesday of this week were surprisingly easy.

Then there was last night. He had not seen Honey in a while since she was in New York, so that could have been part of it, but I really believe he was just seeing what he could get away with. He kept coming out of his room, and usually when I ask him to go back and get in bed, he does. Or I walk him back in and this happens a few times, but it's not the biggest deal. Last night was different. He would walk out, I would ask him to go get back in bed, and he would say "No. I'm not going to."

This happened about 8 times and I tried everything I usually tried like "Oh, I see that you are not a big boy. I guess you cannot go to the Monster Truck Jam because that is just for big boys." To which he would respond "Okay. I don't want to go..." Or: "Davis, do you want me to give your big boy bed away and get you a baby crib?" "Okay. Yes." He would say.

I was calm for the first 10 rounds. Because honestly, I was kind of surprised and curious, and I wanted to see what he would do. We were both pushing each other's buttons, I guess. It went as far as Honey saying "Okay. I guess I have to go home. I cannot play with Davis anymore because he is not listening to his mommy..." This would usually prompt tears and crying and promises of good behavior. Last night he calmly said "Okay."

Finally, I got mad as he stood in the hall just singing "happy birthday" while I looked at him and said "Do. Not. Walk. Into. This. Room." I have told him before that I would lock his door if he cannot stay in his bed and that has always been enough to get him to stay put. So, after exhausting every effort, including taking away the toy Honey just brought him from New York...I walked him back to his room, gently pushed him through the door, and pulled it close.

And then...I held the doorknob. He went to open it and when he realized it was "locked" he went BERZERK. Crying, screaming, throwing himself on the floor. He tried about 50 times to open the door and each time he realized it wasn't opening, he got amped up a little more. At the point where he started to retch (don't feel bad for him- this doesn't take much to get him to this point) I said "DAVIS. ARE YOU READY TO LISTEN?"

"Yes mommy, yes mommy." I walked in and he said, while sniffling and trying to catch his breath "I need a hug. I don't wike that mommy. I will be a good boy. I will not be naughty."

So I gave him a big hug and I talked to him and said "Davis- that is what it is like to have the door locked. If you keep getting up, I will lock the door, and it will not matter how much you cry, I will leave the door locked until morning time. But if you stay in bed, I will leave the door unlocked. I don't want to have to lock the door, I want you to listen and be my nice boy..."

"Okay mommy. I will stay in bed. I will listen. I don't wike that."

And that was that. Tough love, man. Sometimes they need it.

Separately, I got this sweet note from Holden's teacher after I sent them an email yesterday asking how she was doing since she cried so much when I left yesterday:

Sorry Sam that I didn't get your email until now.  Please always feel free to call the center and talk with us....I don't want you wondering what is going on.  It is hard to leave when she is crying, but she really had a good day yesterday.  We stayed in for the morning, so less transition time and painted which she enjoyed.  Still adjusting to the one nap schedule, so does seem very tired for nap...goes right to sleep and truly wakes up refreshed, ready to eat snack and play outside. She is adjusting well and we are so happy to have her in the classroom.  Every day will get even better as she learns the schedule and we create bonding time. 

Happy Thursday!